Manipulation

 

Manipulation

Manipulation is a tricky word.  It can be used to describe a way to shift gears in your vehicle, the way a toddler will grin up at Daddy to get him to smile back, a chiropractor manipulating a joint back into place, the way a politician or a preacher presents their take on something, the way a dog coerces you to go for a walk, or the way slot machines are programmed to ultimately get more money than they lose.

Some of the elements I list in this article are going to trigger your anger and past guilt.  I want to make it clear that the reason I am choosing this topic is because of the way we use these elements on ourselves.  We can’t change our own self talk until we see how it’s done.  Instead of blaming ourselves for something that has been modeled for us by our parents and society, we need to acknowledge that it is a manipulation and that we can learn to honor ourselves by adding new tools to our toolboxes.

Bullies target your weaknesses and exploit them to get you to do whatever it is they want you to do.  We all recognize overt bullying, but we don’t always recognize covert bullying.  I see bullying used in advertising.  I have no problem with a picture or a description of a product.  I do think there is a problem with insinuating that a product will make you thinner, more beautiful, sexy, loved, or wealthier.   Those are definitely human weaknesses that are easy to target and have proved to be financially successful for decades. 

Bullying can also be used to discredit the opposition as in politics or any other competition for a position of power.  It has become popular to discredit the opposition because it triggers human emotional response which saves a lot of time.   It is easier to emotionally manipulate the vast majority of the public with a few chosen words than it is to collect the data and show the facts. 

We can be easy to manipulate due to our cognitive bias, using it as if it were a process that identifies facts. Cognitive bias was the topic of a previous post you will find in the link below.

https://davismastermind.blogspot.com/2020/08/cognitive-bias.html

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation causing the recipient to question themselves, particularly when the perpetrator is trying to disguise their own agenda.  Often presented in the form of a joke where the perpetrator will say something that includes the phrase, “Just joking!”  The relationship usually includes a lot of undermining, discounting, and trivializing another person’s thoughts and feelings.  A gaslighter often makes derisive comments on your remarks when you are out in public or at family gatherings.  Sometimes these comments are presented in a joking manner and other times they come out as pure exasperation over your limited thinking abilities.

Guilt-baiting is targeting a recipients’ weakness.  For example: The family dog has recently died and one person is feeling the vacancy and begins the conversation about getting another dog.  A guilt-baiting response could go something like this, “You were never here when the dog needed you.  You were at work.  I was the one who walked the dog, bought the dogfood and cleaned up all of the messes.”

There is often some truth behind the words of the guilt-baiter.  It is true that you do go to work.  However, you almost always spent time with the dog after dinner, walking it and tossing the ball for it.  You may not have cleaned up most of its accidents because you were at work and it probably didn’t have any accidents in the evening, if you were taking it outside for a walk.  It’s highly likely that your money paid for the dogfood even though somebody else actually did the grocery shopping.

I personally am not swayed by a giant poster of Coca a Cola .  I not only don’t like the way it tastes, as a young mother I didn’t have room in the food budget for any kind of soda.  Unless you have an awareness that you were manipulated to want a Coke by looking at a giant poster, you will probably continue on a quest to locate one. The same goes for cake, muffins, tattoos, diamond rings, or a Caribbean cruise.

Pinkwashing is a term that refers to a company, specifically alcohol companies, who donate money to charities to show the consumer that they are really good people with really good intentions.  You are already aware of alcohol companies sponsoring sporting and other events so I will not describe them. 

Propaganda is the form of deliberately spreading information about a cause.  It doesn’t matter whether it is true or not to make it propaganda.  We often like to use the word in a negative way to describe pamphlets we don’t want to read.

It is easier to prey on the fears of people than it is to educate them with the results of studies or rational observations.  We frequently call things we don’t want to pay attention to conspiracy theories.   I’m not saying that all conspiracy theories aren’t real.  We do have a huge pharmaceutical problem and a lot of misinformation about our food sources in this country.  What I am saying is that we use language to manipulate the energy that we want someone to feel.

The point of this article is to encourage you to examine how many of these elements triggered you.  How many of these elements do you use on yourself?  That is the main reason for my mastermind blog.  How can you grow where you are planted?  How can you rise above poverty consciousness?  You don’t have to shove anything down anybody else’s throat, but you DO HAVE TO STOP doing it to yourself.

When you watch TV or listen to a podcast, things will begin to jump out at you.  Remember that when we are watching a movie or reading a fiction book, that we agree to suspend belief for the purpose of our own entertainment.  How many of you really believe that the pookah called Harvey is real?  How many of you have watched televangelists who exaggerate, yell, and dance around to emphasize the point they are trying to make?  Here’s one that makes me laugh, “Pork, the other white meat!” I about died laughing when I say a commercial about ED. 

It would be incredibly easy to show examples of manipulation using the current state of politics and the literal health of the world, but that is not the kind of manipulation that I am interested in participating in.  One of the benefits of the internet is the ability for scientists, doctors, and other accredited people to make valuable information available to the public.  More than ever, we the people, can actually read the data supplied, or listen to the evidence that health care professionals have tracked over years of working with their patients.  They can post their findings in a way that does not keep them hidden in boring medical journals. 

Here’s a bonus bit of information.  Dr. Kellog DID NOT create Kellog’s cornflakes in order to stop masturbation.   He did however write several articles on the 39 illnesses including acne which he believed were caused by masturbation.  He recommended an unstimulating diet.  Corn Flakes were created as an easy breakfast solution that was also unstimulating.  He and his brother had a falling out on the addition of sugar to the formula. 

I want to leave you thinking about ethical and unethical manipulation.  I want you to think about it every time you make a disparaging remark or think a negative thought about yourself.  Maybe somebody else told me I was ugly, fat, or stupid, but why on earth do I do it to myself?  It is not productive.

Sincerely, Carmen